When I was younger, like Jr. High/High School aged, If I would have a bad day, I would come home, grab the bag of chips, and proceed to eat the entire bag. I wouldn't even THINK about what I was doing.
Until I was done.
Then, I would feel like such a pig. I would literally get so mad at myself. And call myself fat. And berate myself, put myself down. It was a vicious cycle.
Then I would SWEAR and promise myself that no more.I would change. I would work out to work it off. Did it ever happen? Maybe once out of 7 days.
As I grew up even more, into young adulthood, and even into married life, things never changed. The cycle kept on and on. I felt like a failure each time it happened. I would then make deals with myself. With God. With whoever would listen ( usually the cats) that I would change the next day. But I never did.
Food has always been my comfort and go to "thing" when I am down and depressed. But the problem with that is I am also an emotional eater. When I am happy, I want to eat. When I am celebrating, I want to eat. I take comfort in food. And while that it is not a bad thing, when done in moderation, I did not watch what I did. I just continued on this cycle.
I still catch myself going to food late at night when I am bored. Knowing good and well I am not hungry I am just bored and can't sleep. It's something that I struggle with daily.
So I KNOW where you are coming from. If you need to, hit me up to talk when you are bored and want to eat. When you are sad and want to eat. I would love to be here for you.
Xoxox
Stephanie
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